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New Years Resolutions: Change for the best! ...'er sumpin lyke dat


By basilsands - Posted on 05 January 2010

I am all for change, especially when you have the exact amount. But what if the exact amount doesn't add up to what your thought. For example, at the present there is 83 cents in change in my left pants pocket. 25 cents of which is Canadian, therefore I'm not sure how accurate the original 83 number stands.

As for future change, in the tradition of New Years Resolutions:
1. This year I will take off the 25% extra me I put on after shoulder surgery last year.
2. I will sell at least one of the four novels I have written.
2b. I will sell at least one of the four movie scripts I have written.
3. I will learn how to make Kung Pao Chicken as good as Pagoda Restaurant in North Pole (best Chinese food in interior Alaska, was even on the Food Network.)
4. I will not say stupid things that make my wife not talk to me.
6. Get my web radio talk show syndicated for actual pay.
5. I will never wear speedos to the pool unless I take off that 25% weight plus another 10%, and get a ripped six pack abs and no double chin, because a double chin with a six pack just ruins the whole effect of speedos. Not that I have ever worn speedos, or even that my wife or anyone else has ever imagined me in speedos, although if they have that would explain some of the rude looks I get for no apparent reason at all by women who suddenly gasp in shock and cover their children's eyes. At any rate, I will not wear a speedo, ever in 2010.

At least that last one, I kind of have control over.

Hope your year is starting off with a bang!

Cover art done by Jerry Scullion of sculliondesign.com